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Blogger, full-time bum and proud owner of a rubber duck named Bert. Come say hi. I don't bite. Unless you're a cheesecake, then I'd recommend backing away slowly.

Saturday, 1 December 2012


Papa J-isms: for those who don't have the time to say Papa J-isms. Jisms. Like Jizzims. But not.

I'd like to start of the blog post by saying that it is freezing at the moment. I am typing with mittens on right now. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD THAT IS?!

And that's not the only thing that is hard...

Script-writing. Script-writing is also hard.

Here's some soap,
clean your filthy mind with it.

I'm trying to write my creative project's script at the moment, which is a superhero mockumentary. Basically, I wanted to create a fake documentary setting, and fill it with comedy and a character that the audience can relate to. The protagonist is portrayed as quite an isolated character, who is picked upon by society for his quirks. He's just an every-day guy who has grown bored of the mundaneness that is reality, and has created a world of his own as a way of coping with reality, a world in which he possesses superpowers.

My mind's a little muddled, so that probably won't make much sense to any of you. I'll post the script for it here once I'm finished writing/re-drafting it.

Friday's lesson was quite short in all honesty. We were doing a two hour lighting class. But fifteen minutes of it was spent on a coffee break.

I can't link you the video we were watching on said coffee break. It involved two people doing it doggy style... before the guy somehow swivels around and   starts (for lack of a better explanatory term) see-sawing the woman.

ME: Why do I feel as though we should stand up and give that man a ten?
DOUGAL: I don't think anyone would be able to do that... well, maybe Przemek.
PRZEMEK: ... What?
The rest of the day? Well... it wasn't any classier.
SIMON: ... What would happen if a Siamese twin had a stroke? Would one side just... die? *realises what he's saying* This sounds like it should be in one of Frankie Boyle's sketches.
And when the Papa J stories came out... yeah. All possibilities of mature conversations went out the window. 
DEAN: I remember me and Alison went to vist Papa J in his shop one day, and there was this girl trying on an outfit. She was with her boyfriend, but he wasn't really paying attention. So she asked Papa J if she looked alright, and... okay, you're me, and I'm Papa J! *turns to his left* "Aye..." *slowly spins around towards Simon once more, eyes wide* "I love my job."
Simon pretty much collapses with laughter at this point. Someone suggests that Papa J should have his own book/film.
ME: Papa-Jisms.
DOUGAL: Jisms. *Simon starts listening in at this precise moment* Ummm... maybe... not... Jisms.
Just a little catch-up for you all.

Can't believe it's December now. How can it only be twenty four days until Christmas?! 

Also, yes. I have an advent calendar. I don't care if I'm eighteen *coughcoughandahalfcoughcough*. Chocolate is chocolate, and chocolate is good.


Lauren xxx

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