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Blogger, full-time bum and proud owner of a rubber duck named Bert. Come say hi. I don't bite. Unless you're a cheesecake, then I'd recommend backing away slowly.

Thursday, 4 August 2011


An emergency stop is classed as a maneuver during your driving test... did you know that? 

I didn't... but I do now! The joys of learning.

As you could probably tell, I had another driving lesson today. This is the first time I have thoroughly enjoyed it and felt as though I was getting somewhere.

I learnt quite a few things from today's lesson, not all of them useful to passing the driving test:
  1. I am incredibly short. This doesn't help when it comes to reference points as you need to add twenty centimeters to each reference point, adjust mirrors just to ensure that I can see the road and I have to adjust my seat to the highest point it will go. It's embarrassing.
  2. When you have the handbrake on, you won't travel very far.
  3. Equally, when you have not put the car into gear, you won't travel very far.
  4. When a police-car is behind you, your eyes spend more time on the speedometer than they do on the road.
  5. If you learn with Red driving school, you are likely to fail.
  6. How the driving examiner will prepare you for an emergency stop:
Firstly, the examiner will notify you that he/she will be likely to ask you to complete an emergency stop on the road you are travelling on.
They will then tell you that they will be looking behind them, but not to do anything until the hold their hand out in front of them and say "Stop!"
After it, they are likely to say "I shan't ask you to do that again." which doesn't mean you've done badly, it's just a precaution in case they see their friend and waves, which you might then misinterpret as a signal to do an emergency stop. That might cause an accident. Not good.

Went round to Megan's house after that, we watched a Star Wars film... I think it was "Empire strikes back". 
ME: Yoda is such a sexual beast.
MEGAN: *Gives me the dirtiest look I've ever seen* Uh....
ME: ... I'm joking.
MEGAN: Uh! Thank God. I thought you were being serious.
ME: No! He looks like an old Gremlin.
MEGAN: An old CUTE Gremlin. 
Yeah. Yoda is cute! 
I also developed a strong hatred for this guy.
ME: *admiring hair* I wondePr what he'd look like with a mohawk.
They should have definitely given him a 'hawk
MEGAN'S MUM: Oh shut up you hairy monkey!!!
MEGAN: Mum hates Chewy. 
I swear, Chewy got more lines than Leia did... HE CAN'T EVEN SPEAK. 

Speaking of Leia...

Megan wandered into the kitchen, grabbed two cinnamon buns and placed them on her ears.
MEGAN: Eh? Who am I?!
MEGAN: We got them specially.
Weirdest thing? She doesn't even like cinnamon buns. She got them purely to make that joke.

Megan's a legend.

Had a lovely chat with her, her Mum and her Dad. Megan and her family are great, so glad I know them. Watching Megan and her Mum do "boxing" was the funniest thing I've seen in a long time!

And I swear, Megan threw so much munch at me, I STILL feel full... urggh. It was so good though! We're the cheese-cake duo.

She likes the filling.
I like the base.
Together, we make a good team.

I don't know if I told you before, but Megan has given me my own theme music, "They call me mellow yellow...."

Apparently, I'm really mellow.
ME: Am I really that mellow?
MEGAN: Yeah.
Her Mum nods in agreement.
ME: Oh.... guess there's worse things to be in life. 
I'm a surfer duuuuuuuuuude at heart. Y'know the turtles in "Finding Nemo"? 

That's me.

Lauren xxx

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