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Blogger, full-time bum and proud owner of a rubber duck named Bert. Come say hi. I don't bite. Unless you're a cheesecake, then I'd recommend backing away slowly.

Thursday, 7 July 2011

Bubblegum tattoos

The source of amusement and adoration
for thousands of wannabe hardcore children...
That and bored teenagers.

Being a Yo! sushi whore (hardly a week goes by without me having a chicken katsu curry from that place), and good friends with Megan and Kelly, we decided we needed a day out together.

So, on Saturday, Megan gave me a lift into Yo! sushi and we met up with Kelly. 

The employee who sat us down made the fatal mistake of sitting Kelly directly in front of the help button...

Buttons are made to be
pressed, just not all the time.

Kelly was trying to decide what to order, so I suggested she got a spicy chicken ISO. 

So she took the dish off of the belt, deliberated (like everyone does when face with a huge piece of sushi) on how to attack it so she could fit it in her mouth and then started eating it...
KELLY: *chews* Oooooooooh! *face lights up*
Of course, when you suggest a food to your friend, who ends up liking your suggestion, you feel like a God.

You feel like life has cheated you, however, when your friend starts hating the food half-way through eating it.
KELLY: Ich... ih!! *mouthful, she begins flapping her hand next to her mouth* IH!! *drinks water* That is the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted.

They must have put too much of that Japanese pepper on it... it's nice if they just put a sprinkling on it, but terrible if they put too much on, because that stuff tastes like you are eating tiny flakes of hell!

We all loved the yakisoba though.

Sorry, the "noodles".

The man asked if we ordered the yakisobas, and Megan and Kelly just looked blankly at him. 
ME: Noodles?
KELLY AND MEGAN: Oh! *accepts Yakisobas* 
I may not know the prices of all the dishes, but I sure do know their names and their coloured plates.

As said, I'm a bit of a Yo! Sushi whore.

And that's why I knew that Kelly shouldn't attempt to eat the chocolate cake on her own.

So what if the cake is a 200th of the size of that?
That cake is so sickly sweet, eating it is like willingly
eating yourself into a sugar coma.

I learnt that lesson the hard way back on the last day of 2010, when Abie and Lewis took it off the belt and could hardly finish off the third bite.

I blame the meringues.

Kelly proved me wrong though, she finished it off, chocolate topping and all, in less than ten minutes.

Me and Megan applauded her for this. I'd call it a success.

Who knew gluttony was a spectator sport?

Apart from America that is.

Megan provided Debenhams with the anorexia inducing line:
"Don't see your size? Lose weight."
I'm going to remember that one actually... might incorporate it into a script. Or my Art folio... either one!

We then discovered that Megan had never been to Aberdeen's greatest sweet shop, Wowzies.
KELLY: Do you know that you are not breathing right now?
MEGAN: Whaaa?
KELLY: Because you've never been to Wowzies!
ME: *exhales* I thought you were meaning that she died! 
Megan bought giant jazzies, I bought popping candy and Kelly... deciding to be awkward (as always) only had 6p left, so she bought a tattoo bubblegum piece for 5p, and one sherbet tube for 1p 

So, where did she stick her tattoo you ask?


She decided, as a hardcore gangsta, to place it on her boob.

*shakes head*

Even worse? You are meant to use water to attach the tattoo to yourself, so she was attempting to lick her boob.

Yes. Yes, I am friends with these people.

And I enjoy every single second I spend with them.

Lauren xxx

1 comment:

  1. If I ran a restaurant/takeaway like that I'd really corner the market for your business, Lauren... I'd give it a movie and music theme and call it:

    Desperately Seeking Sushi!

    From guess who...