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Blogger, full-time bum and proud owner of a rubber duck named Bert. Come say hi. I don't bite. Unless you're a cheesecake, then I'd recommend backing away slowly.

Sunday, 19 June 2011

Woah, Dude, Is that a chipolata?

I used to love these wee things...
Now, I feel genuinely disgusted by them

Respect others and respect others property.

Only fair, right?

Someone tell the douche bags at my school that.

Our common room gets trashed every Thursday afternoon.

Now, the strange thing is no sixth year has free periods on Thursday afternoon... And it's a sixth year common room... so some little brats have been coming into our common room and completely messing it up.

I'm talking rubbish lying everywhere, abandoned pieces of food, chipolatas hidden under tables as if it's a disgusting version of the game of "Where's Wally" and even milk in the toastie maker.

Second period involved so much cleaning! 

Megan found a Henry the hoover (which automatically made me think of Russell Howard => click) so Zoe was zooming around with it, picking up just about EVERYTHING lying on the floor that wasn't sealed to the floor

Sara (who thinks she has a bit of OCD) was going around with a pooper-scooper, picking up all of the little bits of sweets or food lying on the floor. Yes. This did include four chipolatas... And yes. Sara did throw them at me. 


OKAY. She threw them at the bin bag I was holding, but I had to leap back because that mouldy sausage was getting a little bit too close to me for my liking.

I couldn't tell whether or not they were chipolatas or turds either... so I was a little on edge.

Megan was a bit of a wizard with that broom. Just clearing up all the floor. And then she started on wiping down the tables. She does not like mess.

We shouldn't have bothered doing that before break though, as Abie had bought Lucas a cake (a hedgehog cake to be precise) and it ended up being smeared all over the nice clean tables.

Awww well. It'll be alright in a wipe.


If I am ever asked to give a toilet paper company a tagline, it will definitely be "It'll be alright in a wipe"


Strange as it sounds, I had to photoshop an astronaut into a ship-wreck during this double period.

Even stranger? This was no normal shipwreck. Oh no, this was a ship-wreck in the library.

In fact, the ship crashed into a book called "World's worst shipping disasters".

The whole thing is very surreal.

Went out to take some photos after that, using Kelly as my model and a toast rack, a teacup and a model of a fish as our props.

At one point, I was lying on the road to try to get a semi decent shot.

Yeah... Safety...
*shifty eyes*

And I'm very worried about Mr McDonald.

As he was down in Glasgow, marking Advanced Higher Art Folios for the day, we all went crazy...

Okay. I can't lie to you guys. We were so tame, we would put the average pet goldfish to shame. 

However, Aaron and Kelly went snooping in his cupboard.

And do you know what they found?

Believe it.

They were chatting at the door into the cupboard, so I decided to have a look and see what they were up to when:
ME: What are you guys... WOAH!
Aaron turned around, holding a sword.
KELLY: Look what we found!
I finally understand why that door is always shut...

To prevent a homicide.

I'm never going to take a rampage in that classroom. I value my life.

I went to Megan's in the afternoon, we played an hour or so of Assassin's Creed before we headed back to school to pick up a USB from Ms Rankin.

Apart from, we didn't know where Rankin was.

So we sat on the steps down to music.

Then we heard a voice, curiously, we poked our head around the corner, realising it was our head teacher. We kind of looked at eachother after that, because we remembered we weren't in school uniform and God knows what he would have done to us.

So we calmly walked down the stairs, hearing his approaching footsteps, we slowly opened the door, and then WOOSH.

We were off.

Somehow, we managed to find ourselves in a cupboard.

*shrugs* Ce la vie!

We never got caught.

Because we're ninjas like that.

After that, we went back to Megan's and had another "Fight Club Friday".

It's safe to say, we know everything there is know about that movie. The foreshadowing, the easter eggs, the subtle differences in camera shots... we know it all now.

And yet, it still has a certain affect on us.

Then we watched this TV show... I can't remember what it was called! But I remember laughing like mad at this woman...

What. A. Tube.

Lauren xxx

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