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Blogger, full-time bum and proud owner of a rubber duck named Bert. Come say hi. I don't bite. Unless you're a cheesecake, then I'd recommend backing away slowly.

Sunday, 24 October 2010

Wagner and viagra. There is a difference.

Good evening world!

How is everyone this fine day/night?

I don't know why I am so chirpy... was woken up at 9 by my iPod.

I set SEVEN alarms... I went back to sleep after every single one.

Had a little convo about that whilst watching the X Factor about that with my Mum actually...
ME: Mum, I swear I have a condition where I find difficulty in dragging myself out of bed in the morning
 MUM: Yes you do, it's called laziness.
Haha, thanks for your constant support Mum.

Some of you may be wondering why I was up at 9 on a Saturday.


Wasn't by choice let me tell you that.


Halle needed me to help her with her paper round.


Yah see, she's got two jobs (If anyone is counting, that's two more than me)


One is her paper round, which is fairly decent because it's only 20 papers and it only really takes fifteen minutes for her.


The second one is selling pies at Pittodrie, Aberdeen's footbal pitch.


So Halle, if you're reading this, mucho respect for holding down two jobs and being a superb little ninja!


Now. I'm aware that some of you will not have a clue about me or my personality.


I am a major screw up.


Seriously, give me a shirt to iron, you'll have a hole in it, give me a bowling ball, I'll break the barriers and ensure that the only way of mending them will be to duck tape them up, give me a shallow end of a swimming pool, and I will nearly drown in it... 


Stories from that mini paragraph are all true by the way. Apart from the first one.


Which probably explained my parent's reaction when I told them I was going to be doing Halle's paper round...
DAD: You? Delivering papers? Aww well, Halle'll be out of a job by Monday.
MUM: People will be saying "Where's my paper!?"
Yeah. As said, My parent's are very supportive.

I was determined NOT to screw up though, for Halle's sake!


She drew me a map (Super cute AND easy to follow) and highlighted the houses I needed to deliver too.


And although it took me Fourty five minutes (I know, why did it take me that long?!) there were only three minor problems.


Problem number one: I fell. Yup. Totally faceplanted on some Granny's stairs. I fail at life.


Problem number two: I was about six inches away from delivering papers to the wrong house. Then I realised that the wind flipped the page over and I was  going to deliver to unhighlighted houses.


Problem number three: I kinda lost my way. Twice. But I would have TOTALLY found that street if that kindly Granny didn't point me in the right direction.



Sad, I know, but I am a photographer god dammit and I will take photo's of everything I do....

Okay. Not everything. I do care about your psychological well being.

Actually studied some Biology stuff after papers... well that was a shock.

Watched Russell Howard's good news as well... Oh my god that guy is hilarious! Really want to see him now!

"Can't blacks and ginger not come together? They did it with Jaffa Cakes!"

It's such a feel good show. I seriously recommend watching it if you haven't already (iPlayer. No words.)

Anyone else notice the amount of rainbows today? GORGEOUS! 


You didn't notice the rainbows? At least tell me you saw the candyfloss clouds!


Mmmmmm. Sugary goodness.

And then my Mum bought me cookies.... AHHH bliss!


Markies have awesome stuff. First the cookie you see in my mouth right there... Mmmmm....

And then I had their tomato and basil soup for Tea... WOW! Amazing.

Top the night off? X factor.

Love the socialising part of that show more than anything. Watching it with my Mum, tweeting about it on twitter and then chatting about it in school, it's awesome.

My Dad keeps calling Wagner Viagra... So when it was announced that he was away to come onto stage (Maybe come isn't the right word choice in that sentance...) I said to my Mum...
ME: Wagner's still to come.... Oh sorry... Viagra...
MUM: Oh noo.... He needs some!
ME: What... WHAT?!?! Why?!
MUM: I don't know... It will give me something else to focus on rather than his singing...
Yeah. Watching Wagner dry humping Louis' leg is clearly a better option than listening to him singing "Livin' la vida loca".

Awwww... Just turned 00.00 here... Yah know what that means?
Officially the last day of October holidays!!

R.I.P October Holidays... You will be sorely missed.


Ahh well, enjoy the last of your weekends folks!


Lauren xxx

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